Real Housewives OC 8

Before I get going on my rants about the ladies I am going to comment on "glamping". It doesn't seem even remotely fun. Why would anyone spend that kind of money to cook your own dinner and to have bugs crawling down your bra? Not to mention the bees, skunks, and other undesirable creatures that are just waiting to annoy or scare the crap out of you. When will human beings ever understand that the wilderness is for the animals and insects and not for the people folk. I for one, understand this which is why I will never go camping, glamping, or whatever. Then you have to do more work by cooking and cleaning, when I could just do that in the comfort of my own home. Sorry to all of my camping blog readers, but I just don't understand the fun of roughing it.

Gretchen, clearly was not having fun with her voice snafu. But why the waterworks? Just drink some tea with honey and get over it. And her relationship with Douchebag just gets more and more disgraceful as this season goes on. I hate to say it, and I have alluded to it before, but my respect goes down a little for Gretchen the more I see her constantly giving Slade more reason to be more douchey.

Eddie and Tamras relationship is something that I think is too cute for words. I just love how they played tiddlywinks with Tamra's old titties. But what I liked even more was Eddie's acceptance of Tamra's decision to remove the boobs in the first place. That is something that definitely is rare today. Eddie and Tamra are my OC housewives couple of the season. Just love them to pieces.

A pair who won't ever be the couple of the season is Alexis and Heather. I am going to continue with what I said on my last two installments about Heather. She is really much more down to earth than was first portrayed and Heather, please don't make me regret saying that by reverting back to the snob that you were when this season first started. I think Alexis is the snob with all her talks about how much she pays in rent and how many cars her husband owns. Heather is right, she can buy a friggen place. Alexis said she bought a Prius to save the environment, I believe she bought a Prius to appear to be green friendly. I truly think that it is all appearances when it comes to Alexis. She cares so much what people think of her that it covers up how she really feels about herself. Poor Alexis, but hooray for Heather for speaking her mind.

And hooray for me. I am going on vacation and will be taking a week or so off from this blog. However, I will be back with another installment of the OC Housewives and yes, an installment from the premier of the new season of the Real Housewives of New Jersey which I can't hardly wait for.

Until then, that's all I got. Ciao for now.

Real Housewives OC 8

I really have to give props to Heather. I am not saying that she has redeemed herself completely but OC's token brunette is becoming the come back kid in my book. She may still be a little on the snobby side, but she has the best party ideas. First an elegantly catered, low carbohydrate painting party, and in this last episode she hosted a fun champagne bowling night. I only wish Alexis and Tamra could have been in attendance.

Tamra was having her breast reduction surgery. Yes I said breast reduction. I know it is a rare procedure today but Tamra is now a part of the Ity Bitty Titty Committee. I am so glad that Gretchen welcomed her into our exclusive club with a bottle of tequila in the shape of a penis. Now, that is a gift I would like to have myself. But, why did Bravo's cameras have to show her implant being pulled out of her bosom. It reminded me of a C-Section child birth, but instead it was the death of Tamra's big knockers. I don't know if Eddie can handle Tamra's new chest size, I think it will get some getting use to.

One thing that I got used to is Alexis' nose job. Kudos to that surgeon. You can't even tell she got any work done. Poor Alexis. I crown her the Queen of Dumb. She royally screwed up her "Fox 5" interview. First, she messed up the psychologists name who she was interviewing. But, the worst part is that she kept talking like she was some sort of expert on the subject matter and didn't give much time for the real experts, who were doctors in their field, to comment, or respond to any of her questions. I almost fell off my very deep sofa when Alexis then said that she had taken Journalism in college. O. M. G.!!!! Seriously??? I took a class in Anthropology in college and it doesn't mean that I am some sort of expert in primate evolution. WOW. I am just dumbfounded.

I am also dumbfounded when it comes to Slade. I can not believe that Gretchen's voice mail greeting says to call Slade to get a hold of her. And then he follows her around like a lost puppy to everything she has to attend to. I am really starting to lose respect for Gretchen. Does she really need a douchebag with her at all times. What does he bring to the table? What does he do besides just sit there and make weird faces? She is enabling him to be the douchebag that he is and she likes it. She can get any man she wants, I just don't understand. it just makes me want to scream.

Someone who did a whole lot of screaming was Gretchen's crazy friend Sarah. Oh wow!!! Can somebody say "coo coo for cocoa puffs"??? This chick is whack to say the least. I love Heather's husband's comment, "Where did she park her spaceship". It couldn't be more true. Sarah reminded me of the first season Kelly Bensimon was on the Real Housewives of New York. I wouldn't be surprised if she had a restraining order against her by some poor soul because she seems like a person who would be guilty of stalking. I really think Gretchen should have taken her to the hospital and had her committed as a 5150 instead of taking her to a bowling party.

Vicky handled Sarah like a champ. I am not always a fan of Vicky, but she showed nothing but class against a nut job like Sarah. She escaped that bowling alley without a scratch. She also escaped with a one pricey bottle of champagne for her and Brooks being kick ass bowlers. Congratulations Vicky. It seems like she's going to need that champagne because it seems to me that she is very lukewarm when it comes to this relationship she has with Brooks. He on the other hand seems like he's playing her and using her, he is just overdoing it with all the cards, and fancy dinners. Something about Brooks seems fake to me and Vicky just doesn't seem happy. I have a feeling this is a romance that is not going to last for very much longer.

Another thing that isn't going to last much longer is this installment because that's all I got. Ciao for now!!! :-)

Real Housewives OC 7

Hello everyone!!! It has been two long weeks. What's up Bravo??? Why the repeat week???  I had nothing to do last Tuesday night around this time so please never do that again. Thank you.

The one think I was anticipating the most was Briana's test results. Again, what a special woman who deserves a happy and healthy life. I am SO happy for her that I am whistling Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah out of my butt hole. Really, I'm that happy. Okay, sorry to give you all that visual but I just had to.

One visual you, me, or anyone else did NOT need to see was the color picture of the colony of dead aliens that once lived in Alexis' nostrils. I wish I was just having a post traumatic stress episode but I actually had to look at that Mucous Plug AGAIN. YUCK!!!! That just isn't cute.

Something that is cute is Tamra and Eddie. How adorable are they??? Working out together, how dreamy. Another thing that was also dreamy was Eddie's bicep as he flexed his muscle. If I were him I would want to give myself a blowjob, and according to Tamra he might just be able to do that.

I don't think Slade can. Poor Douchebag. Trying to compete with Eddie on athleticism is like Alexis competing with Katie Couric in broadcast journalism. Who do these people think they are??? I really think Alexis and Douchebag need to get together and go bowling, and they can talk about how great each other is. 

I would say that Heather would be in that bowling group too but girlfriend is redeeming herself for me. She actually kicked major ass in the mud run. Damn, I would think that the mere sight of dirt would make her barf, I'm impressed.

I thought Vicky was going to barf when Brooks kissed her at the restaurant. She says that she doesn't like PDA's, but did you see her face when she described his occupation as being a "consultant". I think deep inside Vicky is disgusted that Brooks too, is a dead beat dad, and worse, he has a questionable job as a "consultant". At least she can breathe a sigh of relief that her daughter is well.

Tamra can also breathe freely now that she's divorced. And Tamra, if for the teeny weenie, itty bitty chance, that you will read this. As a child of divorce, rest assured that it is much better to have divorced parents that are happy then to have married parents that are unhappy. Tamra's marriage to Simon was just one train wreck after another. So good riddance to Simon and hello to Eddie who gives you a healthy relationship, and a tight ass at the gym.

That's all I got, Ciao for now!!!