Real Housewives OC 3

First of all I have to give props to my girl Melanie for sharing the experience that is the Real Housewives of the OC with me, and I have to give her props for wanting to know about these women and what they are all about but halfway through this episode, I didn't think I would have much to write since the first half was kind of lackluster. Now I don't know where to start.

I know, I will start with the one who is like the one black Labrador in a litter of all yellow puppies... you guessed it. Heather. It is like she is now in this group of semi intelligent, somewhat non pretentious/down to earth and crazy women. Heather, besides the fact she's the only brunette, is this snobby, thinks she's too cool for school, wanna be. I hate to burst Heather's bubble of conceit but girlfriend, you are a housewife!!!! And I am sure with that big of a house, you have help with the kids, which by the way I have the utmost respect for women whose job is being a mom. But Heather, what is it that she does in life? She is not an actress, not a singer, and I couldn't believe when she said she was a stand up comic. Her funny? I'd think that watching golf on tv.would be funnier than she'd be. Who does she think she is??? Own up to what you are and stop pretending to be someone else. Yes, I like Heather very much, can't you tell?

I did like Vicky last season, but she is getting on my last nerve. Why is she all of a sudden resorting to acting like a forth grader, when it comes to the friendship of Gretchen and Tamra(Tamchen). Why is Vicky so threatened? I mean Tamra at least had the decency to show up at her house and cook an egg white scramble for herself. Vicky, Tamra still has love for you, don't be such a drama queen. But please be a good mom. She didn't seem to want to talk to her daughter about the fact that her daughter has the big "C".  Come on Vicky mom up!!! Your daughter seems more adult than you, perhaps you should listen to her. Also, Vicky says that she fought for her marriage. Paaaahlease, she did not. She wanted out of that marriage just as bad as Donn did. Don't try to pretend you are some victim. Your daughter knows better.

Slade's mom also knows better, apparently. I love that woman. If Liz had her fan club, I'd join in two shakes of a lambs tail. His comedy sucked, and he has now climbed the douchebag totem pole yet again. I don't know if he can ever get down now,  and if he did, he'd probably need Gretchen to come up and get him. Maybe he and Heather can have their own non funny version of a comedy show.

What is not going to be funny is the backlash that Gretchen is going to receive at the hands of Vicky for what Slade said, comparing her to Mrs. Piggy, and then what Gretchen is going to say back to Vicky for herself being in a relationship with a dead beat dad. Okay, I lied. It will be funny. Also will Tamchen survive Slade's not so flattering remarks about Tamra?

That is okay because Tamra gets all the flattering she needs from Eddie. Should he win the best boyfriend award or the worst pushover award? The romantic in me says best boyfriend. What a guy!!! So understanding, and so supportive. I'd make Eddie a rifleman in my beloved corps(line from Full Metal Jacket).

Speaking of rifleman, kind of, okay not really, I think I am ready to announce my girl-crush this season. It is Gretchen. Damn! She has an amazing body, hilarious, bluntly sexual, smart as all heck, and girlfriend runs her own successful business(with the help from Slade). It is no wonder that Tamra wants to be your BFF, I would too. Don't worry Camile from Beverly Hills, you are my one and only girl-crush on your show.

That is all I got from this weeks episode. Ciao for now! :-)

Real Houswives OC 2

Hello all!!! Welcome to my bloggy blogg. This is what I got for this weeks episode of The Real Housewives of the OC.

Heather, two things girlfriend. First, I grossed out when you made that comment that you husband is part your husband and part a little brother. Eeeeew, incest much!!! Oh, but I take that back because apparently you and your husband don't have sex anymore, or so she wants us all to think. hmmmm.... Also, this is only the third episode and I'm already sick of her talking about how she's an actress. Um, I don't recall ever seeing heather in any show or commercial, and I'm too lazy to Google her so if any of you all want to fill me in on what she's been in, I'd appreciate it, and maybe she might redeem herself a little in my book.

Luckily, I don't have to Google Brooks because apparently Gretchen has done us all the favor of doing it for us. BOMBSHELL: Brooks is a dead beat dad, who was a arrested and from what I have heard, spent time behind bars. YIKES!!! I think Slade is just as much a douchebag as I always did, but come on. To give him this ammunition is going to be a knife in Vicky's hypocritical back. I don't know about you, but I can't wait for this volcano to erupt. It is going to be viewing pleasure that will put Teresa Giudice and Danielle Staub's from New Jersey's argument to shame. Although I don't think Vicky has extensions to pull out, but maybe Gretchen does.

What Gretchen does have is Tamra's friendship. I just love how they bonded at the sex shop. I don't know if any of you caught it but Tamra spent a whopping $295 and some change there. You go Tamra!!! You show that Eddie the only hands that are going to be touching your boobs are his, maybe that will help him forgive you from what an asshole of yourself you made. But I do like this new friendship because I think Gretchen and Tamra do have much in common.

Tamra and Vicky I feel are going down hill. There is no way Vicky can take Tamchen(a combination of Tamra and Gretchen). Last season I would have said that Tamchen didn't stand a chance against Vicky, but I think poor competitive Vicky's got another thing coming. However, I do think Vicky did win the painting contest.

Before I go, I just have to say something off topic. I don't know how she managed to get herself on the Celebrity Apprentice but Donald Trump, PLEASE FIRE TERESA GIUDICE.  By the way, since when does people have to start saying her last name Joo-dich-ee and not Joo-dice as she used to be called. She's just gross.

That's all I got, ciao for now!!!

Real Housewives OC 1

Welcome to my blog about the Real Housewives. Here is some commentary about last Tuesday's episode:

Alexis is the most insecure out of this bunch. I don't understand why she didn't talk to Peggy, Peggy was trying to "talk it out". But apparently, Alexis is too bitter about the fact that Peggy once f'ed her husband before they were married. I gotto feel sorry for Peggy.. By the way, Peggy looks like she can be the sister of Beverly Hills' Taylor. PLEASE Peggy, don't leave this group of girls, I love your chutzbah.

Speaking of Chutzbah, we finally have a Jew on a housewives show that is oh so proud. I loved Heather's line "I am the only brunette Jew in a world of Shcikzah blondes in the OC". But I am not so sure I like Heather. She seems to exist on a high horse but maybe she's earned that pedestal. We will just have to wait and see. She does have beau coup bucks. Her house is as big as my entire condominium complex.

Gretchen seems to have a complex that I think I like so far. She has the boobs(figuratively and literally) to pose nude for the cause of saving the boobies. You gotto love her for that. You know, last season I thought she was a bit of a tool because she was with a man who didn't pay child support, and the jury is still out on Slade on his likability. But I do think that he loves, oops I mean worships Gretchen's sacred ground. I'm not sure I'd want a puppy dog for a boyfriend, but you go Gretchen, you get that leash out and drag that man around. I just hope she doesn't slip and tell him to give her his paw.

About paws, I can't believe Eddie got kind of flirty with Vicky right in front of their significant others. What I can't believe more is that Tamra grabbed poor unsuspecting Brooks' hand and grabbed her boob with it. Can somebody say inappropriate? Really Tamra, that was not classy. I do agree what Eddie and Vicky were doing first wasn't quite kosher, but getting even with him by the forced boob grab was like a Jew drinking bacon with a glass of milk. I think Heather would get that joke.

That is all I got for now, ciao for now.